Hi, my name is Julie and I have Mom-guilt. Every day. I am a single Mom with three kids and no possible way to please them all, even though I try my darndest. This past weekend was all about my 13-year-old. In my house, when you turn 13, you get to pick a destination and I do my best to make a trip happen, this is in lieu of some ridiculously expensive, ritualistic, religious event. My son chose London, and I managed to plan the trip to coincide with a London visit by his best friend who had moved to Australia two years ago. Unfortunately, the trip also coincided with my ex and his long planned vacation out of the country as well, but my trusted nanny would be here to watch over my two youngest, along with a bevy of friends who allowed for play dates galore while I would be gone. So off we went on our flight across the Pond!
The London surprise was wonderful and the boys just stood there and stared at each other in disbelief, a perfect pay off. What I had not anticipated or even imagined was the text I received the first morning after we had arrived telling me that my middle son “had a wee bit of a fall” and fractured his wrist. Even typing that out, my heart still sinks. My sweet boy had to go to the hospital with someone other than his Mom or Dad. Thankfully for him the person that took him, “T”, is a gentle soul and family friend (for life now,) so he was well cared for and tended to with a father’s calm and reassuring nature.
He’s fine ultimately, and the rest of the London visit was splendid as I did my best to keep my spirit’s up, but this is definitely one of those moments in life that I will always remember not being there for. My Bear Totem was firmly clutched in my hand pretty much the rest of the trip. There is no 12-step program for Mom-guilt, there’s only one step: Accept that we can’t be in more than one place at a time and that as long as we do the best we can and parent with love, our children will be ok. It also helps to have really wonderful friends! Thanks for everything “T”, (and your wife and kids of course, for lending you to my son!)
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